One of the best and worst takeaway pizza close to London Bridge

When 133 pizzas from 60 Southwark pizzerias hits your intestine, that’s amore.

Even by my requirements, this explicit Greatest and Worst group check was a monumentally daft endeavor. Consuming pizzas from any restaurant, takeaway or avenue meals stall that gives supply or assortment within the northern half of Southwark is a coronary-baiting endeavour.

However I’m nothing if not cussed within the face of a problem, particularly through the omicron waves which made eating out indoors to be an excellent riskier exercise. Apart from needing some type of geographical restrict to make this Greatest and West group check virtually possible, the northern chunk of Southwark – roughly encompassing Lambeth, Kennington, Waterloo, Elephant and Citadel, London Bridge and clumps of each Walworth and Bermondsey – was chosen fairly intentionally.

With a mix of unbiased and chain pizzerias serving a number of types of pizza to folks from nearly each revenue group, this Thames-crowned chunk of Southwark strikes me as an inexpensive proxy indicator for the state of pizza in London as a complete. However there’s another excuse why I selected this explicit a part of London: the now closed ASAP Pizza.

ASAP Pizza wasn’t simply the primary lockdown pivot type of the now-shuttered restaurant Flor. It additionally pushed the artwork of London pizza forwards a bit with revolutionary combos of toppings and decisions of grains in its bases – all with out ever turning into too intelligent for its personal good. Innovation, in each dough and toppings, needs to be a mainstay of London pizza.

That doesn’t imply there’s no worth within the vaunted Neapolitan-style margherita pizza – removed from it. The puffy, gently elastic and effortlessly gentle base is a carbohydrate marvel. The topping triumvirate of acidic, candy, umami tomatoes, creamy mozzarella and aromatic basil is rightly timeless.

What I needed from this round-up, other than a snapshot of the capital’s pizzas in all its multihued cacophony, was a pizzeria or two that serves each forward-looking and time-honoured pizzas. A pie with ASAP-esque imaginative aptitude alongside a Neapolitan-style margherita worthy of the title.

That’s a tall order. A really tall order certainly.

An administrative be aware: though I discover the exploitative ‘gig economic system’ enterprise fashions of supply apps corresponding to Deliveroo and Uber Eats to be extremely distasteful, I additionally couldn’t have accomplished this group check with out them – ordering direct and amassing wasn’t at all times potential. The best way I tried to sq. it with my conscience was by tipping the drivers generously – their precarious livelihoods rely upon it.

Desk of contents

The eating places

400 Rabbits
Azzurro
Bon Vino Enoteca Maltby Avenue
Caprini
Caravan (Bankside department)
Collective Kennington Park Cafe
Crust Bros
The Hearth Station (Waterloo)
Francesco’s
Franco Manca (Southwark)
Gordon Ramsay Avenue Pizza (Southwark)
Gourmand Pizza Co
O’ver (Borough)
Pizza Specific (London Bridge)
Pizzeria Pappagone Sud
Pizza Pilgrims (Waterloo)
The Pizza Room
Theo’s (Elephant and Citadel)
Vapiano (Bankside)
Zizzi (London Bridge)

The supply manufacturers and darkish kitchens

Basilico, Twisted Slice, Pizza Verde, Protein Pizza, Inexperienced Goat
Greenwood
Spizza Napoletana
Veggie Crust
Village Pizza Vegan

The pubs

Flatboys
The Libertine
The Three Stags

The old-fashioned takeaways

Huge Ben
De Milano
Forno
HFC
Sincere Pizza
La Parma
Pizza2Go
Pizza GoGo
Pizzeria L’Opera
Crimson Planet
Tops
Verona, La Milano, La Venice
Yummie Pizza

Avenue meals

Dangerous Boy Pizza Society
Fresco at Mercato Metropolitano
Good Slice at Flat Iron Sq.

The huge chains

Domino’s
Papa John’s
Pizza Hut

Simply exterior the borough

50 Kalò di Ciro Salvo
Bella Italia (The Strand)
Frankie and Benny’s (The Strand)
L’Antica Pizzeria da Michele

Conclusions and The Winners

The eating places

400 Rabbits

For a restaurant named 400 Rabbits, it’s considerably disappointing that it doesn’t provide any pizzas topped with bunny meat. It does serve a pizza topped with rhubarb – the candy and modestly tart slivers appearing as a neat counterpart to the earthy goat’s cheese which was simply highly effective sufficient to overwhelm the mozzarella. The aromatic basil held its personal on what was extra of a goat’s cheese pizza than a rhubarb one, but it surely wasn’t worse off for it.

400 Rabbits’ margherita unexpectedly got here with out basil. Given the milquetoast mozzarella, it was left to the candy and umami tomato to hold the toppings of this pizza. The vegan model was nearly equivalent, however for the substitute vegan cheese which was weirdly weightless and vaguely vegetal in style. It was extra like consuming gentle boiled egg whites than cheese, which made for an particularly unsatisfying pizza.

400 Rabbits clearly has some points with its mozzarella provide, as a modestly elastic and creamier occasion of the cheese appeared alongside candy and milky feta on the merely named The Feta. I’m not solely satisfied that the 2 cheeses actually complimented one another, however no less than the pine nuts and salsa verde lent a distinctively punchy presence to this odd two-cheese pizza.

Though the mozzarella was as soon as once more missing-in-action taste-wise on The Beef, that was actually my solely beef with this pizza. Basically a greater model of the ‘supreme’ pizzas obtainable from the chains, the tang of the bottom beef was offset by the crisp, crunchy inexperienced bell peppers and onions. The tomato paste was, as soon as once more, candy and umami.

‘Milk’ gelato had that oddly candy milkiness you solely ever discover in ‘milk’-flavoured desserts and ice cream. Ethereal and comparatively clean with just a few errant ice crystals, it wasn’t unhealthy however was nonetheless missing in comparison with among the different gelato obtainable in London.

In addition to the oddly inconsistent mozzarella, 400 Rabbit’s pizza dough was liable to ups and downs. Starting from gentle, tuggably pliable, moderately puffy and charred on a very good day to considerably denser, thicker and chewier on a nasty day, the crusts and bases have been finally the most important hurdle to a reliably good pizza from 400 Rabbits.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.75
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Azzurro

Nestled in a railway arch close to Waterloo, Azzurro may seem like an unbiased restaurant at first look. It’s really an outpost of the City Centre Eating places Group which runs, amongst different issues, the Cafe Giardino retailers in procuring centres corresponding to Lakeside. If I’d recognized this earlier than ordering, it may need ready me for the boxed mediocrity to return.

Azzurro’s margherita was neither right here nor there. The gentle, floppy base and skinny, crispy crust have been corresponding to the better-quality grocery store efforts. The basil was solely sometimes fragrant, whereas the tomato had intermittent bursts of acidity. The meek mozzarella introduced little to the celebration apart from its pale eggshell white colouring.

The Daniele used the margherita as a basis, primarily as a conveyor for the overwhelming sweetness of the caramelised onions and fleshy peppers. It was so candy that not even the limp rocket may get a phrase in. The goat’s cheese didn’t style of a lot, but it surely did no less than add a mouthpleasingly creamy consistency to an in any other case one-note pizza.

Regardless of nearly trying like a log, Azzurro’s tiramisu was principally cream. Occasional tingles of booze, espresso and bittersweet darkish chocolate hinted at what this wisp of a dessert may’ve been.

Azzurro’s pizzas aren’t as offensively unhealthy as among the others on this group check. However I simply can’t deliver myself to award Three Stars to a restaurant dishing up pizzas so drained and compromised.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £12.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Bon Vino Enoteca Maltby Avenue

A wine bar that additionally occurs to serve pizza doesn’t sound like a promising prospect, however Bon Vino Maltby turned out to be unexpectedly pleasurable. The crusts and bases have been ethereal, elastic and puffy with a delicate char, simply going toe-to-toe with the very best of the competitors on this round-up.

Bon Vino’s margherita was blighted by surprisingly muted mozzarella and solely intermittently flavourful basil. The mildly candy and umami tomato, together with that superlative dough, made up for these flaws to an extent.

Though salsicca and friarielli is hardly an unconventional selection of toppings, I plumped for this white pizza anyway and wasn’t disillusioned. The pleasing bitterness of the greens was enhanced additional by the grassy bitterness of pesto, all of which was neatly balanced by the moderately creamy cheese. Coarse, salty and meaty clumps of sausage have been the crowning glory of this pizza.

Though Bon Vino misses out on a clear sweep as a result of uneven toppings of the margherita, their efforts are in any other case worthy of a raised glass.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £11
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

Caprini

On the time of writing and so far as I do know, Caprini is the one one in every of Southwark’s trad trattorias nonetheless buying and selling in takeaway pizzas with the others dine-in solely. Caprini’s skinny and soulless crusts can be extra at house in a grocery store chiller cupboard quite than within the kitchen of any self-respecting Italian restaurant. On the margherita, these drab bases have been matched by an equally bland mix of tomato, cheese and – inexplicably – dried oregano. Poor.

Sticking poached pears on a pizza may sound like heresy, however Caprini nearly managed to drag it off. The sweetness of the squidgy pears was neatly complimented by the distinctively punchy tang of blue cheese, although the latter was outnumbered by humdrum-quality mozzarella and pointless rocket. There’s the core of a good suggestion right here; it simply wants higher execution.

Caprini will need to have performed one thing proper to have lasted this lengthy, having apparently been buying and selling because the Sixties. However, from their pizzas, I can’t inform what that might probably be.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Caravan

Caravan is a mini-chain of vaguely antipodean eating places, though that impression could also be attributable to their preliminary focus (a few years in the past) on espresso. Whereas I loved their breakfasts at their King’s Cross department within the Earlier than Instances, the pizzas from their Bankside location have been extra uneven.

The crust and base on the tomato-less speck and egg pizza proved to be dense, doughy and thick sufficient {that a} knife was sometimes required, quite than merely tearing it aside with one’s arms. Each the cheese and the speck have been disappointingly meek. The reasonably wealthy egg and occasional wafts of rosemary needed to decide up the appreciable slack, for which they have been ill-prepared.

Though finely floor, sausage with the stridently bitter style of fennel made for a positive pizza topping. It nearly made up for the milquetoast taleggio, chilli and tomato in addition to the identical slab of a base that blighted the speck pizza.

Caravan’s margherita benefited from a base and crust that have been considerably much less hench, though it was nonetheless not as puffy and ethereal as among the different higher pizzas on this group check. The mozzarella nonetheless had little to say for itself, whereas the basil and tomato sometimes piped up with a little bit of perfume and a smidge of sweetness and acidity, respectively.

Maple pecan pie tasted principally of brown sugar-derived sweetness, with solely a whisper of maple syrup and the occasional crunch of extant pecans. Skinny, nearly non-existent pastry and wilting if considerably fleshy kumquats rounded out a dreary little dessert.

Pistachio and lemon tart not solely suffered from the identical anorexic pastry because the maple pecan pie, it solely had occasional hits of each pistachio and lemon. The whipped cream did have a light floral sweetness to it, apparently courtesy of honey, however ultimately this dessert was a waste of energy, cash and energy.

A good topping right here and there aren’t sufficient to make it price bothering with Caravan’s in any other case humdrum pizzas.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £11.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Collective Kennington Park Cafe

Nestled inside Kennington Park, this cafe has considerably restricted night hours. Nonetheless, it may possibly knock out a good pizza crust. Whereas the dense crusts weren’t fairly as ethereal as the very best Neapolitans, they have been nonetheless delicately gentle and pliably chewy.

Collective’s margherita thrummed with umami, frivolously acidic tomato. The basil solely had a modest waft to it although, whereas the mozzarella was surprisingly tame regardless of its slippery tautness.

The tomato-less white Portabello benefited from the earthy peatiness of its namesake mushroom. The addition of double cream and Cornish brie did surprisingly little to bolster the mozzarella although. The previous was muted, whereas the brie solely introduced an occasional funky hit to the combo. There’s a nascent nugget of an concept for a very good pizza right here, it simply wants a bit extra refinement.

Whereas the outcomes of the Collective effort right here aren’t triumphant chart-toppers, the pizzas are nonetheless respectable and make for a positive fallback choice for Kenningtonites. 

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.50
Crusts- bin, sin, or win? Win.

Crust Bros

Neither I nor my eating companion Highway Runner have been anticipating a lot from the Waterloo outlet of this two-branch mini-chain. But it surely seems that Crust Bros can whip up pizza crusts and bases that put lots of its rivals to disgrace – puffy and elastic with a pillowy softness.

The issue with Crust Bros is that their toppings aren’t at all times as much as the standard of their dough. The meh mozzarella and wilting basil meant that the margherita leaned closely on the candy acidity of its tomatoes. The vegan margherita suffered from the identical issues, compounded additional by the unpleasantly gummy plant-based cheese substitute that additionally had an odd, hard-to-place synthetic style to it.

A part of Crust Bros’ schtick is the considerably overwrought names for his or her pizzas. Their 4 cheese pizza, for instance, is named the Cheesus Crust. Though the parmesan, mozzarella and goats’ cheese have been considerably misplaced within the combine, the smokiness and creamy wallop of the scamorza and the tangy astringency of the gorgonzola greater than made up for it.

The nutella pizza used the identical top quality dough as its savoury efforts, with the hazelnut-chocolate spared slathered on prime for a darkish, candy, mildly nutty and chewy deal with. Crust Bros’ tiramisu was dominated by its booze-soaked biscuits, with not almost sufficient of every thing else.

Crust Bros has clear potential – it’s only a disgrace that it’s not totally baked. But?

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £8.45
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

The Hearth Station

As its title suggests, Hearth Station is yet one more municipal constructing remodeled right into a retail funding alternative – extra particularly on this case, a holding pen for perma-sozzled House Counties sorts unsteadily ready for his or her trains at close by Waterloo.

Whereas Hearth Station’s pizzas weren’t flawless, they have been nonetheless a lot better than I anticipated – particularly for pizzas from a restaurant that additionally dishes up burgers and fried hen. The You Butter Nut, for instance, was surprisingly pleasurable – even when the toppings did come throughout as a pumpkin curry going by way of a midlife disaster. The candy, gentle butternut squash melded properly with crunchy sweetcorn, slippery spring onions and the distinctly flavoured coconut yoghurt which contrasted with the very delicate, occasional surges of warmth from the chillies.

The Carbonara was much less just like the pasta dish and extra akin (considerably) to a sausage and egg McMuffin with the strong yolk of its cooked-through fried egg. Salty, fatty, crispy pancetta was the dominant topping on this pizza, whereas faint hints of garlic and occasional whispers of earthy, umami cheese lingered within the background. Like most responsible pleasures, it wasn’t in any respect unhealthy so long as you are taking a patronising angle in the direction of its charmingly child-like flaws.

Sadly, even that overly accommodating angle couldn’t make the margherita pleasurable. The cheese and basil have been soulless imposters, whereas the the overwhelming sweetness of tomato was unnecessarily bolstered by the addition of cherry and sundried tomatoes.

The uneven high quality of Hearth Station’s toppings was matched by the extremely uneven nature of their crusts and bases. Whereas at all times skinny, they diversified from crispy to arduous after which moderately puffy and gentle. Honest play to Hearth Station for making an attempt to attempt one thing new with the toppings, however there’s a mismatch right here between what the menu writers need and what the kitchen can accomplish.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £11.75
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Francesco’s

I ponder if there’s an actual Francesco behind Francesco’s, or whether or not it’s some type of fevered advertising and marketing train just like the fictional eponymous ‘duo’ of Frankie and Benny’s.

The odd factor about Francesco’s is that its pizzas marry surprisingly top quality substances with weirdly half-formed carbs. Though there was no basil on the margherita, the tomato was candy and umami, whereas the mozzarella was slippery with a light-weight lactic lilt. The bottom and crust appeared vaguely Neapolitan, however the base was unwholesomely stiff. The crust averted being stodgy, regardless of its chewy thickness, making it one thing of a responsible pleasure.

None of Francesco’s different topping combos took my fancy, however its pizza ‘wraps’ caught my eye. The margherita wrap was actually a complete margherita rolled up like a rug able to be bundled right into a shifting van, nearly trying like a dürüm because of this. This quasi-calzone (or semi-stromboli, if you happen to favor) tasted lots just like the margherita. However not solely was the tomato a lot much less noticeable, this oddity was round half the worth of the usual margherita.

Francesco’s takeaway tiramisus are served in wee plastic cups. The usual model largely consisted of coffee-flavoured cream teabagging a number of flaccid sponge biscuits. The pistachio variant added an oddly synthetic pistachio flavour that had all of the fragrant attraction of plasticine.

From its crusts to its pizza ‘wraps’, Francesco’s reaches excessive, however doesn’t fairly make the touchdown. Nonetheless it’s a superbly first rate hyperlocal fallback choice for Camberwellites. 

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Franco Manca

Franco Manca is a London pizza establishment with good purpose. The bases and crusts are normally exemplary – puffy, charred and gently chewy. Even once they’re off-base, they nonetheless handle to be respectably ethereal and gentle. 

A ragu of beef and pork was feathery in its tenderness, whereas nonetheless retaining a wealthy umami and mouth coating meatiness. It melded surprisingly properly with the aromatic basil, umami tomato and creamy, elastic mozzarella.

400 Rabbits wasn’t the one restaurant right here to have points with its mozzarella. The mozzarella on Franco Manca’s margherita was surprisingly tame, leaving the heavy lifting to the candy, acidic tomato and fragrant basil.

The tiramisu was largely a heap of bland cream. Disappointing.

Regardless of the problems with its mozzarella, Franco Manca stays a positive selection for high-quality pizza.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £7.85
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

Gordon Ramsay Avenue Pizza

The blonde sweary one has a few pizza eating places dotted throughout London. The Southwark department is itself positioned beneath a department of Bread Avenue Kitchen, like some type of chain restaurant Escher drawing or the hospitality equal of an inbred bastard stepchild imprisoned beneath the steps.

Anyway, it seems that the blonde sweary one tries to do some ASAP Pizza-style envelope-pushing with its pizza dough. I may very well be mistaken, however their crusts and bases seem to have been enriched with corn/maize for a noticeably chewier, hearity and marginally nuttier impact. Whereas totally different, the vaguely focaccia-like texture didn’t strike me as essentially higher. The inconsistent high quality of the baking was off-putting, with some crust segments singed into blackened astringency.

The toppings of the margherita have been simply as higgledy-piggledy. From the peaks of the umami tomato the troughs of the ineffectual basil and the massive medallions of oddly unmelted mozzarella, this was a muddle of a pizza.

The kitchen had the nice sense to not try a vegan pizza primarily based round a plant-based cheese substitute, opting as an alternative for a marinara-derived tomato-only basis. Presumably cheeseless pesto added one other layer of delicate moreishness to the tomato. The scattering of pine nuts introduced their distinctive creamy nuttiness to the combo, however solely intermittently so given their restricted numbers. Sadly, the wee cubes of aubergine have been deeply missing in each texture and style. A blended bag.

I actually don’t perceive the purpose of Gordon Ramsay Avenue Pizza. For a restaurant owned by a previously boundary-pushing chef, their obvious try at shaking up the carby foundations of pizzadom turned out to be neither right here nor there. In the meantime, its total high quality simply isn’t as much as snuff. Even if you happen to dined on the restaurant to reap the benefits of their sit-down all-you-can-eat shtick, you’d rapidly find yourself questioning why you didn’t patronise one in every of Southwark’s quite a few better-quality pizzerias as an alternative.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £13
Crusts- bin, sin, or win? Sin.

Gourmand Pizza Co

I’ve at all times suspected that this restaurant was a vacationer lure: the Zone 1 riverside location and having ‘gourmand’ in its title are all extremely suss. Having sampled their takeaway pizzas, I’m extra satisfied of this than ever. Their bases and crusts one way or the other managed to be stodgy and nearly inedibly arduous, regardless of being wafer skinny.

The furnace-blasted basil gracing the margherita had been rendered lifeless, whereas the fudged mess of tomato and cheese was outstanding in its blandness.

Whereas designed for vegans, omnivores and vegans alike ought to keep away from the mushroom and pine nut pizza like a contagious airborne virus. The overwhelming style of rosemary couldn’t disguise the lifeless mushrooms or the feel of the vegan cheese substitute which resembled each wallpaper paste and coconut oil. Its glommy, slimy mouthfeel was deeply unappetising and can be extra at house in a check tube than on a pizza. The astringent pine nuts, which tasted extra like burnt popcorn kernels, have been the crowning achievement on this violation of the Geneva Conference.

Regardless of ample quantities of cream, the biscuit layer of the tiramisu was suspiciously arid. Unconvincing chocolate wasn’t helped by a whiff of what was in all probability alleged to be espresso and booze, however was about as fragrant as a diesel pump.

Completely not. Don’t even give it some thought.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.25
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

O’ver

O’ver’s distinctive promoting level, if you happen to’ll pardon the onanist advertising and marketing terminology, is that it makes use of sea water in its dough. This allegedly makes meals ‘lighter and simple to digest’, a doubtful declare which nearly stays out of the odious wellness bollocks that I’ve come to despise a lot.

Fortunately for O’ver, their crusts have been simply as puffy as their copywriting. Though sometimes arduous and hard in locations, they have been usually elastic and pliable with a restrained quantity of char. All this made the state of the margherita all of the extra woeful – a meagre quantity of tomato plus mozzarella and basil hardly worthy of the appellations.

The dire state of O’ver’s margherita made the winsome attraction of the ‘Golosa’ all of the extra shocking. Richly creamy mozzarella was joined by milky ricotta and candy, salty mortadella. Though it was odd to style pistachio on a pizza, its initially daring nuttiness rapidly pale after the primary chew, so it finally added little. However no less than it didn’t detract from this interesting pizza.

The kitchen sensibly managed to keep away from overloading their aubergine parmigiana starter with tomato, permitting the the fleshiness of the eggplant and the creamy heft of the cheese to be felt. Though it by no means reached the identical giddy highs of Theo’s aubergine parmigiana, it was extra constant than that model.

Though the tiramisu had the advantage of a fairly booze-soaked biscuit layer, this dessert principally consisted of wan, wilting dairy.

The deconstructed cannoli was even worse. Fairly candy and milky ricotta got here studded with shards of pastry, however these ranged from excessively arduous in locations to overly gentle and rancid in others. The crushed pistachio was unpleasantly and unexpectedly peppery in locations – as if it had been plucked from a countercultural path combine – and even tasted stale in locations. The misshapen pistachio was so bizarrely rank that I needed to get a second opinion, simply in case a stealthy stroke had out of the blue blitzkrieged my style buds. Reader, my style buds weren’t mistaken.

Manky desserts apart, O’ver’s kitchen can knock out a very good pizza once they put their minds to it. Simply ignore their suspect claims about salty sea water.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £12.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

Pizza Specific

There are not any good jokes left to be made about Pizza Specific, however one may squeeze a number of low cost laughs out of their pizzas. The margherita, as an example, was – to my shock – a Margherita In Title Solely. With no basil and meek mozzarella, this MINO was overly depending on its teeth-rottingly candy tomato for style. The bottom and crust, whereas clearly imperfect and never anyplace as pleasing as a very good Neapolitan, did have some charms of its personal. Whereas skinny and light-weight, it had a pudgy plumpness that verged on being loaf-like.

That very same not-quite-there base and crust made for an uneven basis to a remarkably malformed Porchetta pizza. Pulled quite than sliced, the overly tenderised pork had occasional hints of rosemary and thyme that have been – at finest – vaguely paying homage to porchetta in the identical method that lard is paying homage to olive oil. Slivers of pancetta tried to supply some fattiness, however to restricted impact. Faintly musky cheese tried in useless to make up for the dead-on-arrival tomato. What a waste of swine flesh.

The ‘Romana’ base is thinner than the usual, default choice, however the crust was woefully inconsistent – gentle and floppy in locations, chewy in others, crisp and nearly crunchy in additional locations nonetheless. Virtually like a piadina grappling with a mid-life disaster, it was nearly pleasurable as a responsible pleasure. That’s greater than will be mentioned for the ‘BBQ Burnt Ends’ scattered on prime. Extra like stewed chuck steak plucked from a mutated casserole, it was tender sufficient however far too candy. It overwhelmed no matter charms the barbecue sauce, mozzarella and wilting onions might as soon as have had, with solely the oddly bitter tomatoes appearing as a counterpoint. It takes particular ability to make a mockery of each Italian and American meals in a single dish, however Pizza Specific have pulled it off with aplomb.

Though the tiramisu had even quantities of dairy and biscuit, neither tasted of something a lot apart from bland cheapness.

A roulade of lemon curd, white chocolate and meringue really consisted principally of cream with vanishingly little curd. There was some modestly crisp meringue, however this couldn’t disguise both the shortage of curd or the Milky Bar-level white chocolate. Even so, this dessert wasn’t too unhealthy in small doses – making an attempt to eat the entire thing, although, was an train in suppressing one’s gag reflex.

Pizza Specific – what a joke.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Pizzeria Pappagone Sud

As its title alludes to, Pizzeria Pappagone Sud is the southern outpost of the unique restaurant (on Stroud Inexperienced Highway not removed from Finsbury Park) – though not that you simply’d realize it from their oddly slipshod web sites.

The 13in margherita was much more haphazard than the web site. The underwhelmingly common base and crust verged on robust in locations, whereas the basil-free conglomeration of what was allegedly tomato and cheese tasted of cost-cutting and that-will-do.

The identical soulless margherita fashioned the idea of the San Daniele – fairly clearly so with this pizza as a takeaway, with the rocket, taleggio and San Daniele prosciutto served on the facet so that you can layer on prime of the pizza your self. Each the prosciutto and alleged taleggio introduced a woody umami to the proceedings, however they only weren’t sufficient to make up for the dreary margherita basis beneath.

The tiramisu was principally low cost dairy with a number of smudges of sodden biscuit fingers right here and there. With solely imprecise hints of booze and occasional to its title, it was about as convincing a tiramisu as a bag of crisps.

Banoffee pie suffered from fruit that wasn’t candy or squidgy sufficient, an entire lack of caramel, a bit an excessive amount of cream and a biscuit base that was far too skinny to depart a lot of an impression. Poor.

I’m undecided who provides Pizzeria Pappagone Sud with their gelato, however they need to get their a refund and swap. Pistachio was face-shrinkingly salty and astringent, whereas the cherry yoghurt was vaguely bitter for some purpose. The Oreo variant was inexplicably bland, whereas the lemon sorbet was extra like Jif – however no less than it was clean, not like the others which suffered from errant ice crystals and a mouthfeel missing in denseness and smoothness.

If you’d like pizzas filled with disappointment and remorse, then Pizzeria Pappagone Sud is the restaurant for you.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £7.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Pizza Pilgrims

Pizza Pilgrims has come a good distance since its days buying and selling from a avenue meals van, with 16 eating places throughout London and one other in Oxford.

Whereas Pizza Pilgrims’ crusts and bases weren’t fairly as persistently superlative as they’ve been up to now, they nonetheless had extremely respectable ranges of softness and elasticity with occasional cases excelling with gravity-defying ranges of puffiness. The margherita had its acidic, umami tomatoes neatly counterbalanced by taut, slippery mozzarella, with solely the so-so basil letting the facet down.

The headliners of double pepperoni and spicy honey on one other pizza have been underwhelming. The pepperoni, double serving to or not, had vanishingly little stage presence. The honey was mildly candy, quite than spicy, which was nonetheless sufficient to drown out the tomato and mozzarella.

Given the corpulent multitude of toppings on the 8-Cheese pizza, the bottom was considerably thicker and doughier than the others right here from Pizza Pilgrims – and but it remained remarkably elastic and unstodgy in comparison with the worst of the competitors. 

Among the eight claimed cheeses (ricotta, fior di latte mozzarella, Grana Padano, gorgonzola, provola, parmesan and buffalo mozzarella) inevitably obtained misplaced within the combine. The notable standouts have been the milky candy ricotta, the restrained tang of gorgonzola, umami parmesan and the ethereal, milky but wealthy buffalo mozzarella. Whereas all that was inevitably a bit heavy, it additionally made for a luxurious indulgence. The candy chilli ‘jam’ was moderately efficient at reducing by way of all that lactic lavishness, and but I can’t assist however surprise if there isn’t one thing on the market stronger.

The ‘Nutellamisu’ was successfully a tiramisu with a Nutella layer, however inexplicably served as an inverted pyramid. In consequence, the arid bottom-up biscuit base gave a very dry first impression, adopted by a light nutty sweetness and a contact of custardy creaminess. As this underwhelming exemplar exhibits, generally the classics don’t want reinventing.

Whereas most of the different eateries serve up Nutella-topped dessert pizzas, Pizza Pilgrims has lengthy taken a unique route with its calzoney Nutella ring. The pizza dough was gentle and fairly tearable in most locations, sometimes regressing with harder, doughier segments. Even so, it proved to be a fairly mess-free method of heaving the nutty bittersweet darkness of the hazelnut-ish filling into my gob.

Whereas not an outright winner, Pizza Pilgrims’ creditable efforts present why it’s nonetheless so extremely regarded by so many right-minded Londoners.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £8.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

The Pizza Room

The Pizza Room has 5 eating places, 4 of that are dotted throughout south London, with no less than one delivery-only darkish kitchen in Vauxhall.

The most important flaw of their margherita was the standard of the crust. Though moderately ethereal, it was unexpectedly crunchy which deepened its resemblance to low cost grissini-style breadsticks. Not that the toppings have been any higher. The acidic tang of the tomatoes and creamy heft of the mozzarella have been intermittent at finest. The flecks of what may need been dried basil added nothing.

La Primavera was a noticeable enchancment. The floppily skinny base was matched by a crust that, whereas not as superlative as the perfect crusts on this group check, nonetheless had a gentle and ethereal fluffiness that made for simple consuming. The dominant style right here was the saltiness of the graceful mortadella, adopted however not essentially complimented by the delicate sweetness of honey which additionally added a light floral scent. There may need been a garlicky base beneath the drained buffalo mozzarella and wilted pistachios, I’m undecided. What’s sure is that the uneven toppings right here have been a poor match for the improved dough.

The Pizza Room’s skinny base was certainly noticeably thinner than its different efforts with a puffy crispness nearly like a toasted piadina. As soon as once more although, toppings let the facet down. Reasonably candy pears and fairly punchy walnuts have been a very good begin; weeny quantities of tame gorgonzola made for a poor end.

The Pizza Room’s tiramisu struck simply the appropriate ratio between moist biscuits and whipped dairy. Though this tiramisu solely had a light booziness and bittersweetness to its title, it was nonetheless much more edible than among the different tiramisi eaten in the midst of this group check.

The ricotta mousse was extra like a moist, generic sponge cake encased in what appeared like cream cheese and what was alleged to have been a pistachio glaze. However, total, it tasted extra like a generic coconut-flavoured pudding. It wasn’t disagreeable, it simply didn’t stay as much as its ricotta and pistachio billing.

The cocoa parts of the layered white and darkish chocolate mousse weren’t particularly distinctive, however the scattering of biscuit crumbs and rice krispies did no less than lend this dessert a fairly toothsome crunch.

Nutella spooned and splayed over a crisp and reasonably thick pizza-style base wasn’t as texturally pleasing as Pizza Pilgrim’s Nutella ring, however – like every moderately competent Nutella-based dessert – was nonetheless a candy, mouth-coating crowd pleaser.

Wobbling and swaying from mediocre to unbalanced, there’s clearly room for enchancment at The Pizza Room.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.90
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin/Win.

Theo’s

The unique Theo’s is a Camberwell establishment, however then such an accolade doesn’t essentially imply a lot. Whereas broadly Neapolitan in model, the pizzas delivered from the Elephant and Citadel department are bigger than most with a single 12/13in-ish measurement. The standard of the baked dough diversified. It managed to be moderately pliable, puffy and charred in some cases. But it surely was extra inconsistent in others with thicker, chewier, doughier patches giving strategy to overly skinny and floppy patches. Even so, the crusts and bases have been usually respectable throughout a number of meals regardless of this unpredictable inconsistency.

Though Theo’s margherita suffered from surprisingly uninteresting mozzarella and a imprecise, intermittently acidic tomato, it did no less than have some punchy basil to its title. The aubergine and gorgonzola was higher, regardless of utilizing the margherita as a basis. The daring astringency of the blue cheese paired moderately properly with the woody, intermittently fleshy aubergine.

Milky ricotta was paired with surprisingly spicy nduja (spicy by London pizza requirements at any charge). Its piquant aftertaste counterbalanced the ricotta properly, with each livening up the margherita foundations.

The sausage and onion pizza was a shock in additional methods than one. The sausage was remarkably bland, however no less than the onions have been candy. The margherita trio beneath had upped their recreation with mozzarella that lastly had some creamy heft, whereas the tomato was sweeter with some acidity too.

When the celebrities aligned, Theo’s aubergine parmigiana starter was a factor of magnificence. The stacking of fleshy aubergine, umami tomato and creamy cheese generally got here collectively so properly that the tasteful triumvirate felt preordained and inevitable. More often than not although, solely two of three got here collectively which made for a dish that was satisfying solely in suits and bursts.

The crisp golden crust of the pizza fritta starter gave strategy to reveal a chewy doughy layer after which milky ricotta and chunks of salami with a surprisingly gammony presence. Whether or not you consider this as a deep-fried cousin of the calzone or a Mediterranean pasty, it’s properly price having.

Though Theo’s tiramisu was principally creamy dairy, this was finally a very good factor because it proved to be exceedingly wealthy, eggy coating that coddled one’s style buds.

Though it is a takeaway group check, I couldn’t assist however sneak into the abandoned eating room midweek to pattern the dine-in solely ice cream panuzzo. A literal ice cream sandwich, you possibly can have the crusty, moreish and tight-crumbed pizza-dough bread full of a wide range of gelato flavours. Whereas the pistachio gelato was clean and elastic with a flavour moderately true to the nut, this was all obscured by the crustiness of the bread. Even so, the mixture of moreish, hearty carbs and refreshingly cool gelato remains to be one I can ‘ship.

Theo’s is in an odd place the place it’s markedly higher than a lot of the competitors right here – whether or not it’s from different eating places or not – regardless of noticeable high quality wobbles within the consistency of its pizzas. A flawed second-best selection then, however one that also has its charms.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £11.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win/Sin. 

Vapiano

So far, I’ve by no means eaten inside a department of Vapiano. Whereas Vapiano’s pizzas didn’t ship me fleeing in disgust, neither did they go away me hankering for a right away repeat go to to their Bankside department.

A lot to my shock, Vapiano’s bases and crusts have been – whereas not the very best right here – nonetheless eminently scoffable. Crusty, skinny and ethereal with inflexible bases, they held up moderately properly below the arguably overabundant serving to of toppings.

Not that these toppings are essentially as commendable. If it hadn’t been for the candy tomatoes, tinged with occasional hints of umami and acidity, the margherita wouldn’t have tasted of something in any respect.

The ‘Spinach pesto’ was higher, regardless of the just about full absence of pesto. The candy spinach and overwhelming milkiness made for an pleasurable pizza, albeit in a quasi-infantile teat-sucking kinda method given the overwhelmingly dominant milkiness.

Vapiano’s pizzas have been uneven whereas additionally starting from considerably inoffensive to principally pleasurable as a responsible pleasure. Which may sound like I’m damning them with faint reward, however even that middling degree of accomplishment is laudable on this planet of London Bridge pizza.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £10.45
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin/Win.

Zizzi

The Zizzi chain is now maybe finest recognized for that notorious incident involving its Salisbury department. Even so, this graspingly center class chain has lengthy served up an expansive menu of cod and inchoate Italian dishes, together with pizzas.

Regardless of being wafer skinny (and inexplicably dusted with semolina or maize flour), the bases and crusts of Zizzi’s pizzas have been inconsistently crisp – arduous in locations, crunchy in others. The basil-free and bland melange of cheese and tomato on Zizzi’s margherita had extra in widespread with the old-fashioned takeaways than any of the opposite restaurant pizzas.

A white pizza topped with prawn and salami felt cobbled collectively from discarded microwave prepared meals. Leathery salami, congealed cheese and droopingly unhappy prawns all made the cardboard pizza field look positively appetising compared.

A white pizza topped with beef shin proved to be a extra satisfying off-piste effort. Though the stewed beef was too candy for my liking, the smoked burrata and scarmoza melded with the mushrooms to provide a surprisingly wealthy, nearly egg-like impact.

Supply spillage apart, Zizzi’s tiramisu was a considerably uneven and disjointed effort, resembling extra of a very sodden cake with an excessive amount of booze and sponge and never sufficient of every thing else.

A cheesecake of salted honey, raspberry and pistachio sounds intriguing, however the actuality was predictably dreary. The cheese layer was extra like low-grade icing sugar – claggy, cloying and overly candy, overwhelming not solely the scanty quantities of honey and fruit, but additionally soddening the skinny biscuit base.

In a method, I’m glad that locations like Zizzi nonetheless exist as they’re a reminder of every thing that eating places ought to rise above.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £12.75
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

The supply manufacturers and darkish kitchens

Basilico, Twisted Slice, Pizza Verde, Protein Pizza, Inexperienced Goat

Basilico is a long-standing London pizza chain, however that doesn’t hasn’t stopped it from experimenting – no less than from its Tower Bridge Highway department. In addition to buying and selling below the Basilico model, this department additionally dishes out pizzas below the supply app-only Twisted Slice and Pizza Verde banners in addition to the extra distinct manufacturers Protein Pizza for aspiring henchs and Inexperienced Goat for vegans.

Basilico’s bases and crusts have been considerably uncommon, no less than by London requirements. Skinny and double hulled with an ethereal inside, its mouthfeel diversified from pliable to crisply brittle to robust and cardboard-like in others.

Even with these flaws, the margherita was a heavy, leaden disc. The yellow-hued fatberg posing as cheese largely obscured the sweetness and acidity of the tomato, though occasional hits of concentrated basil did handle to seep by way of each now and again.

The mushroom and spinach was largely an enchancment, although the fungus was lacking in motion. The creamy candy greens obtained an additional lactic raise from the clods of heavy cream, whereas the occasional shard of candy, crisp onion supplied a little bit of distinction.

As its title suggests, Twisted Slice is all about uncommon, non-standard toppings. However not solely was its margherita simply as flawed as its dad or mum model’s in all the identical methods, the one twist its personal ‘twisted’ pies was how they have been flawed in so most of the identical methods because the competitors.

The bottom meat of the ‘double’ cheeseburger pizzas was totally forgettable, doubly so for the bacon, tomato and cheese. The dominant parts right here have been the onions and burger sauce with their overwhelming sweetness.

Twisted Slice’s garlic bread was unchewably robust on one event, with treasured little garlic. It was far more pliable and puffy on one other event, though the garlic was nonetheless lacking in motion. This variant had the addition of marmite and cheese, though the surprisingly cautious software of the divisive brown unfold meant its salty, yeasty presence was unexpectedly minimal. The dominant presence was as an alternative the spraying of bland, congealed cheese which clung to the bread like plaque on tooth enamel.

The kimchi and jackfruit, whether or not it was ordered from Twisted Slice or Inexperienced Goat, was equivalent. However this pair was extra akin to the twins from The Shining than Jedward. The bases and crusts had a degree of hardness that may very well be used to shimmy a lock. The jackfruit, cheese and tomato have been like actuality TV stars – garishly colored with zero style beneath. The crunchy sheaves of kimchi did have some sourness and light-weight spice, however this clashed with the candy tang of the pointless and quite low cost identikit BBQ sauce. Kimchi on a pizza is a good suggestion; kimchi on these pizzas was a piss-take.

Inexperienced Goat’s chilli cheese broccoli feels like an unlikely trio of pizza toppings, though no extra so than anything on this group check. The bottom and crust right here have been notably totally different from the remainder of the Basilico household – skinny but gentle and pliable with garlicky hints. If solely all the carbs from the Basilico household have been as pleasing as this. Though the cheese was nonetheless considerably lacklustre, it did have no less than some milkiness to its title which contrasted moderately properly with the comparatively fiery ranges of pep and warmth from the chilli, in addition to the crunch of the supple broccoli. Though the varied parts didn’t fairly come collectively, this was nonetheless an pleasurable pizza.

Pizza Verde’s margherita was, unsurprisingly, almost equivalent to Basilico’s and Twisted Slice’s. The Vegan Sicilian didn’t fare a lot better. The overloaded toppings slid off extra rapidly than a authorities minister doing a U-turn (and with even much less grace), so slices needed to be folded up – nearly like a calzone – for any morsel to have any probability of reaching my gob.

Sadly, the expertise was a bit like being waterboarded with salad cream. The vegan ‘feta’ and ‘mozzarella’ have been unpleasantly gummy, whereas the peppers, tomatoes and pesto have been saccharin of their sweetness. The one respite was the occasional little bit of fleshiness from the wee cubes of artichoke.

Added protein or not, Protein Pizza’s basil-free margherita was not solely a Margherita In Title Solely, however was additionally blander than small speak at a funeral. The crust and base was nearly as dry and arduous because the cardboard field it got here in.

Though Protein Pizza’s fiorentina was blighted by milquetoast spinach and mozzarella, the richness of the eggs and the milkiness of the surprisingly dense ricotta – probably as a result of addition of high-protein cheese – greater than made up for it. It’s a disgrace the crust and base have been nonetheless stiffer than a model although.

Regardless of coming from the identical kitchen, there wasn’t an enormous quantity of consistency within the Nutella pizzas from Basilico, Twisted Slice and Pizza Verde. The mouthfeel of Basilico’s effort was remarkably variable in mouthfeel – nearly inedibly arduous in locations, as crisp as a poppadom in others and excessively chewy in others. Regardless of the limpness of the extant hazelnuts, the Nutella and strawberries labored properly sufficient collectively.

The efforts from Twisted Slice, Pizza Verde and Inexperienced Goat, then again, was persistently crisp and skinny, shattering nearly like a poppadom. In any other case, this lot see-sawed within the depth of the varied toppings – tame Nutella right here, candy strawberries there, no strawberries in any respect in occasion. The dearth of consistency right here actually is baffling.

Basilico and its numerous sub-brands deserve some credit score for attempting to do pizzas in another way. Nevertheless, that credit score doesn’t final lengthy when the outcomes are this haphazardly uneven. To borrow a line from The King – rather less model dialog, a bit higher execution, please.

Basilico
★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £11
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Twisted Slice
★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Pizza Verde
★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £11.85
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Protein Pizza
★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £14
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Inexperienced Goat
★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £11
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin/Win.

Greenwood

It’s unclear if Greenwood is linked to the King’s Faculty Greenwood Theatre close to Man’s Hospital, however I believe not on condition that the London Bridge location has sister kitchens close to Wooden Lane and Liverpool Avenue.

Both method, Greenwood’s margherita did have a half-baked pupil cafeteria really feel to it. As if the tasteless basil wasn’t unhealthy sufficient, the tomatoes had a transient sweetness whereas the mozzarella’s lactic tang was intermittent at finest. The skinny but spongy crust had extra in widespread with sliced bread than with pizza dough.

A 4 cheese pizza isn’t an particularly outre choice, but it surely’s at all times attention-grabbing to see what any given pizzeria will toss into the combo. There was an occasional earthy funk courtesy of goat’s cheese, in addition to an intermittent tilt of creamy mozzarella. A gentle blue cheese tang was current, as was a bit umami courtesy of parmesan. Whereas not essentially the most banging or well-balanced 4 cheese pizza, it did no less than style of one thing – not like Greenwood’s margherita.

Greenwood appears to tout their brought-in freezer cheesecakes, which you’ll eat straight from the bathtub like low cost ice cream, greater than they do their pizzas. ‘Butterscotch and caramel’ was extra like caramel salted so strongly that it may sterilise wounds, but it surely did no less than have some goo and tang to its title. The mouthcoating cream cheese had an odd tang to it, whereas the chocolate crumbs have been no substitute for a correct biscuit base. Bizarre.

Lemon and raspberry was much less dense than the butterscotch and caramel. The raspberry flavour was unconvincing, whereas the lemon manifested itself as a wan, ghostly zestiness within the cream cheese. A skinny layer of biscuit crumbs merely jogged my memory of how a lot I needed an precise biscuit base. Freezer cheesecakes are an attention-grabbing concept, however these examples needs to be put again into the deep freeze.

As with so many pizzerias, Greenwood is let down primarily by its bases and crusts. After they’re as iffy as these blighting a grocery store pizza, you may as properly eat a kind of manhole covers as an alternative. At the least they’re cheaper.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £10
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Spizza Napoletana

‘Spizza’ is outwardly Corsican for pizza, though I don’t know if that has any bearing on this takeaway’s try at Neapolitan-ish pizzas. I say ‘ish’ intentionally as one can see what they’re aiming for with their carbs, although they finally fall flat (if you happen to’ll forgive the deliberate pun). Whereas the bottom was comparatively skinny and versatile, the crusts have been – for essentially the most half – too chewy and arduous. It was considerably softer and puffier in locations, hinting at what this kitchen may accomplish however at the moment can’t with any actual consistency.

The toppings equally struggled. The margherita was spoiled by the oddly bitter tomato and vaguely fragrant basil, however no less than the mozzarella had some creamy heft to it. Properly, each every now and then, anyway.

Salsicca and friarielli isn’t particularly cutting-edge, however I’m a sucker for this topping combo. Whereas the veg was suitably bittersweet and the cheese moderately creamy, the sausage was solely comparatively coarse and definitively uninteresting. A so-so effort, total.

The dough troubles afflicting the pizzas additionally blighted the nutella pizzas. The bottom turned out skinny and crispy in locations, nearly like a piadina, however overly crunchy and chewy in others, then gentle, pliable and ethereal in others. Whereas the chocolate-hazelnut unfold was positive, I’d quite have spooned it immediately out of the jar and into my maw given the dough troubles.

Bless Spizza for attempting, however they should attempt even more durable. Till then, they’re a decidedly second-best choice for takeaway pizza.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Veggie Crust

It takes a particular type of gall to name your pizzeria ‘Veggie Crust’ when there are nearly as many meat-topped pizzas in your menu as there are vegetarian ones. This incongruity is tied to Veggie Crust’s hidden life as an app-only model for old-fashioned takeaway Pizza Mania which in any other case solely appears to supply takeaways for assortment (though I may very well be mistaken on that).

This old-fashioned takeaway-heritage is totally evident within the margherita. Not solely was it a Magherita In Title Solely with no basil evident, it had bafflingly little tomato. The charmless cheese one way or the other managed to ooze grease into the threateningly thick dough slab of a base and crust. 

The melanzane barely lived as much as its title because the headlining aubergine solely managed to muster a light fleshiness earlier than slinking down my gullet. A number of sliced rings of intermittently salty black olives have been extra prone to induce trypophobia than anything. The promised goat’s cheese was lacking in motion, not like the disappointment i felt whereas consuming this pizza.

A laughably lilliputian slice of banoffee pie did no less than have a smudge of squishy, considerably candy banana and toffee. However then the free crumbed biscuit base and skinny cream, flecked with chocolate chips, reminded you that this speck of a dessert was extra of a hazy daydream than an precise dish.

I’d quite eat some smeggie crust than one other slice from Veggie Crust.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £7.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Village Pizza Vegan

Village Pizza Vegan seems to be a plucky mini-chain with 5 places dotted round London and the House Counties. Within the case of its Tabard Avenue location although, it’s really an online-only model of old-fashioned takeaway Pizza2Go. Its vegan-friendly pizzas are very totally different from these at Pizza2Go although.

For a begin, the skinny bases and crusts are a world away from the classically caulk-like affairs from Pizza2Go. They have been drier and extra hard-going than a novel about evaporating paint written within the model of Ulysses. This was particularly evident within the Vegan Margherita which was nearly as beige and parched as a temperance seminar. It was not solely devoid of basil, however of any style by any means.

If ‘Vegan Sizzling Pot’ conjures up visions of a pizza topped with Sichuan peppered tofu or maybe a casserole-inspired mixture of potatoes, onions, carrots and seitan, then I’m afraid I’ve to burst your bubble. The one supply of warmth right here have been the intermittently scorching and bitter jalapenos. These have been additionally the one supply of pleasure on a pizza that sank to new ranges of dismal wretchedness.

Soy-based meatballs weren’t solely bone-dry, however have been so tasteless that they could as properly have been polystyrene packing peanuts. The mysterious medallions of ‘pepperoni’ resembled scabby husks of pores and skin, besides I’m fairly positive my very own dermal flakes really style of one thing. Even the olive slices managed to be overwhelmingly bland, with solely hints of saltiness peeping by way of sometimes. It’s uncommon to come across a dish so bleached of style that I reached for a bottle of vinegar to check my tastebuds and nostril for ageusia and anosmia.

Regardless of ordering a blackcurrant crumble, what really arrived seemed to be some type of toffee cheesecake. It was the least offensive merchandise in your entire order, although the cheese layer nearly resembled marshmallow.

If it have been potential to ship takeaway orders again to the kitchen, as you possibly can with dishes in a restaurant, I might’ve performed so with the dreary discs of despair and despondency from Village Pizza Vegan.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £12.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

The pubs

Flatboys

Though strictly talking not a pub, Flatboys appears to have residencies nearly solely inside pubs corresponding to Kennington’s The Ship. I wasn’t anticipating a lot, which solely heightened my enjoyment of their crusts and bases. Skinny, gentle, pliably elastic and fairly puffy, they have been surprisingly very good. Though the basil on the margherita wasn’t as much as a lot, the mozzarella had a slippery silkiness, whereas the tomatoes have been candy and umami.

Pistachio on a pizza sounds odd, however the nuts have been surprisingly tame. They weren’t missed although as the graceful, salty and slippery mortadella melded seamlessly with the taut mozzarella and milky ricotta for a punchy but gentle serving to of scran.

Flatboys could also be one of many lesser-known pizza operations within the London Bridge space, but it surely deserves much more credit score than its getting. With pizza as well-crafted as this, they’re removed from falling flat.

★★★★★
Margherita worth: £9.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

The Libertine

The Libertine is a correct pub with sticky flooring and oddball characters propping up the bar. Its pizzas have been the weakest of the pub pizzas right here, primarily as a result of bready and stiff however nonetheless skinny and moist bases.

The Libertine’s margherita suffered from wilting tomatoes, however the basil was punchy whereas the mozzarella had some moderately creaminess and heft to it.

Clean, salty and fatty Parma ham was paired with tangy gorgonzola to mouth pleasing impact. Rocket, for as soon as, justified its presence – its pepperiness helped lower by way of the richness of that meat-dairy duo.

Don’t hassle with the brownie. Whereas moderately squidgy and fudge-like, it was finally too dry and wan.

Whereas The Libertine’s pies are the weakest of the pub pizzas right here, they’re nonetheless infinitely preferable to most of the different pizzas on this group check – together with these from many precise eating places.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £8
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

The Three Stags

I nonetheless discover the thought of pubs serving pizzas to be fairly odd, so a pub dishing up vegan pizzas alongside the same old topping suspects instantly tickled my cheese-addled thoughts.

Though the crusts have been a tad too dense and thick, they have been removed from robust or inedible because of their bouncy, puffy softness blackened simply so with a little bit of char. The lactic heft of the margherita’s mozzarella melded fantastically with the sweetness and acidity of the tomatoes and the herby perfume of the basil.

The Three Stags’ vegan pizza suffered from unpleasantly gummy cheese-substitute, however no less than there wasn’t an excessive amount of of it. Aubergine and mushrooms have been in scant provide, so the candy, squidgy courgettes and candy bell peppers took centre stage alongside the tomato. This was a closely one-note pizza, though it was nonetheless significantly much less grotesque than among the different vegan pizzas on this round-up.

The Three Stags’ efforts aren’t with out their flaws, however these have been nonetheless respectable pizzas – and never simply by the requirements of a pub.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £9.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Win.

The old fashioned takeaways

Some will scoff on the very concept of reviewing old-fashioned pizza takeaways, particularly as they nearly all use kits from the identical small variety of ‘meals service’ catering provide corporations. However not solely are most individuals unaware of this interchangeable identikit pizza cabal, I did pledge to evaluate all the pizza eateries in my roughly-circumscribed patch of Southwark.

Nevertheless, that does imply a slight change of method for this part of the group check. To keep away from in any other case deeply repetitive textual content, I’ll be masking among the ‘margherita’ pizzas from these takeaways within the subsequent paragraph or two. The entire extra uncommon pizzas for every eatery will then be coated individually. Hopefully this may all nonetheless be straightforward sufficient to comply with.

One essential factor to remember with most of the ‘margheritas’ from these old-fashioned takeaways is that they’re Margheritas In Title Solely (MINO, if you’ll) as a result of apparent lack of basil and the just about assured absence of olive oil. The crusts and bases are thick and considerably stodgy, albeit gentle and squidgy affairs which have extra in widespread with a grocery store price range bread loaf than the higher high quality pizza doughs right here.

The tasteless melanage of cheese and tomato not solely tends to be inoffensively bland, however seemingly intentionally so. It’s nearly as in the event that they’re designed to look appealingly and televisually gooey in any respect prices, together with at the price of style, with maybe a touch of sweetness and acidity from the tomato sometimes, defiantly peeking by way of. The congealed cheese-and-tomato combine tends to take a seat on prime of the bottom as a discreet layer, quite than seeping and melding in as with the higher high quality pizzas right here, nearly resembling plaque on dental enamel quite than one thing you’d really wish to eat.

All this is applicable to the MINO cheese and tomato pizzas from Huge Ben, Sincere Pizza, Crimson Planet and Tops.

The partial exceptions have been De Milano, HFC and Pizza2Go. In the meantime Forno, La Parma, Pizza GoGo, Verona (aka La Milano and La Venice) and Yummie Pizza managed to be extra totally different.

De Milano’s effort was nearly equivalent to the miscreants above, however for the addition of precise however droopy basil. Sincere Pizza’s MINO was additionally extremely just like the above, however had solely a vestigial crust with the toppings going straight to the sting.

HFC’s effort was – like your first adolescent whirlwind love affair – sweaty, spotty, overly desirous to please and with an awesome saccharine-like sweetness. Pizza2Go added some dried basil to its in any other case cookie-cutter cheese and tomato effort, kinda sorta making it an precise margherita quite than simply one other Margherita In Title Solely. The inexperienced flecks added a transient herbiness to an in any other case forgettable pizza.

Huge Ben

Suitably sufficient for a pizza takeaway named after one in every of London’s landmarks, Huge Ben has a pizza named ‘The Vacationer’ which comes topped with meatballs, tandoori hen, onions, jalapeno peppers and garlic sauce alongside the cheese. The tasteless hen tinged with meals colouring was the culinary equal of brownface, whereas the ‘meatballs’ have been in actuality simply scabs of congealed mince.

Regardless of these obvious flaws, there was nonetheless pleasure available from this pizza. The reasonably spicy jalapenos melded with the creamy heft of the cheese, each on prime of the pizza and inside a stuffed crust model of the borderline stodgy, squidgy and bread-like crust, to make a surprisingly pleasurable responsible pleasure.

Huge Ben’s tiramisu nearly appeared like a Philadelphia cream cheese sandwich and tasted like espresso cake skirting dangerously near its use-by date.

When you’re going to insist on ordering pizza from an old-fashioned takeaway, then Huge Ben – with very even handed ordering – is among the least worst choices.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

De Milano

De Milano isn’t associated to La Milano, one in every of Verona’s alt buying and selling names, so far as I do know. The one amusing factor concerning the Sausage Ardour was the title. The promised salami and olive oil was absent, whereas the ‘scorching canine’ slices tasted like bland, grainy turkey-based pepperoni. ‘American sausage’ was vaguely garlicky. The tomato had very occasional hints of acidity, whereas the cheese had even much less to say for itself. This motley choice of butcher’s and grocer’s rejects was made even insupportable by the froth mattress of a crust.

De Milano’s Hanky Panky pie wasn’t, surprisingly, a carbon copy of the one from Crimson Planet. Vaguely like an enbiggened Oreo, a wince-inducingly candy layer of frosting got here sandwiched between a crunchy, tightly crumbed darkish biscuit layer on the underside and a vaguely chocolatey layer up prime. It’s much less hanky panky and extra like a fumbled snog around the again of the bike shed.

It was whereas attempting to abdomen the distress of De Milano’s pizzas that I began to query the knowledge of this complete endeavor.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £11.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Forno

‘Forno’ is outwardly Italian for ‘oven’, though the oven utilized by this takeaway in all probability doesn’t meet all of the stringent standards required by the gatekeepers of Neapolitan pizzas. The crusts right here have been skinny and light-weight, however spongy of their breadiness.

The cheese and tomato of Forno’s Margherita In Title Solely melded right into a generic umami that pale rapidly.

Forno’s California was much better. The bittersweet combo of spinach and sun-dried tomato, dotted with the occasional crunch of pink onion and the saltiness of feta, helped partially wash away the reminiscence of the dreary margherita. Tomato, cheese and dill added a light moreishness. Regardless of the nonetheless spongy crust, all these toppings made for an enjoyably responsible pleasure.

Forno’s tiramisu was nearly equivalent to the one from Verona – a spongy, frigidly chilly and bland mockery of an precise tiramisu.

Forno could make a half-decent pizza when the kitchen places its thoughts to it. They simply want to try this a bit extra typically.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £8.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin/Bin.

HFC

As its Colonel-inspired title alludes to, this takeaway doesn’t simply dish up pizza however a complete smorgasbord of different Friday evening classics from fried hen to kebabs.

Its ‘skinny and crispy’ base was solely marginally extra waifish than its lavatory normal, bread-like ‘deep pan’ effort and never crispier in any respect. The prawns, cheese and tomato added remarkably little to the ‘Ocean delight.’ Even the tuna solely managed so as to add an occasional fishy brine-like presence, which can as properly have come straight out of a tin. The massive fish on this pond have been the wee anchovies which added a salty, briney hit.

HFC’s pizza aren’t full POS, however TBH IMHO AFAICT they’re treading water.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £6.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Sincere Pizza

Sincere Pizza isn’t associated to Sincere Burger. It’s simply in addition to it’d be surprising if one in every of London’s finest burger eating places had out of the blue tried their hand at pizzas and give you one thing so stunningly common.

To be truthful to Sincere Pizza, whereas the crust on their margherita (talked about above) was distinctly undistinctive, they managed a greater job with the crust on their doner kebab pizza. Whereas nonetheless doughy and thick, it did one way or the other have a crisply puffy mantle – no less than when heat – which proved to be a responsible pleasure.

This was greater than will be mentioned for the meat. The dry coils of what was allegedly doner meat have been made edible solely by liberally making use of the pots of garlicky spicy sauce, served on the facet. The onions and extant tomatoes have been simply as beige because the melted cheese and tomato.

The headliner of the chocolate fudge cake was far too strong to go as fudge, but it surely was no less than candy – which might be the very best one can hope for in a dessert from an old-fashioned takeaway. The thriller white layer was excessively candy, whereas the biscuit base was tightly crumbed.

If solely Sincere Pizza had been in a position to replicate their crisply puff crust – it will’ve been lots simpler to forgive their dreary toppings. As it’s, Two Stars and no cigar. 

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin/Win.

La Parma

La Parma isn’t fairly like a lot of the different old-fashioned takeaways right here. Quite than thick and stodgy, its dough fashioned skinny and light-weight, but floppily insubstantial crusts and bases. Consider a bog-standard grocery store pizza base and also you’ll be alongside the appropriate strains.

La Parma’s margherita not solely had precise basil, however aromatic basil as well. It was much more pleasurable than the swirly mass of generic tomato and cheese which had settled into a skinny layer that may very well be peeled off the bottom like lifeless, chapped pores and skin.

The seize bag of fruits de mer on La Parma’s seafood pizza had the texture of a grocery store choice, however this performed into this pizza’s messy, dribbly, salty strengths. Mixing shrimp and squid rings into the cheese and clamato-like concoction of brine and tomato made for an unexpectedly cockle-tingling responsible pleasure.

It’s nearly spectacular how malformed La Parma’s tiramisu is at each conceivable degree. The biscuit layer was a dry husk with a imprecise trace of booze, whereas the alleged cheese was wince-inducingly frigid.

La Parma’s pizzas are the tough equal of a broadly inoffensive grocery store pizza, however with the cooking performed for you. That could be the very best anybody can hope for from an old-fashioned takeaway.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Pizza2Go

A bolognese pizza is the type of culinary creation that might launch a thousand memes if it was outrageously daft sufficient. Sadly, Pizza2Go didn’t have the stones and ended up creating what would’ve been a semi-serious try at a correct pizza if it hadn’t been so ham-fisted. 

Shrug-inducing minced beef had faint hints of booze, whereas onions and mushrooms had an occasional moreish tang. It hardly made for a convincing bolognese ragu, even much less so when taken with the identical squidgy, stodgy base and tomato sauce dotted with dried basil as Huge Ben’s margherita. When you order the stuffed crust variant, don’t attempt to be intelligent by slicing the crust open length-ways to slurp out the cheese and pepperoni inside. The sickly candy cheese and a budget, credulity-stretching so-called pepperoni made for slimy, unwholesome consuming. That is in all probability the closest I’ll ever come to dissecting a bovine fallopian tube.

The loose-crumbed base of the Tennessee toffee pie nearly resembled Hobnob crumbs. However this goodwill was wasted by the insipid saccharine sweetness of the toffee and icing sugar/cream cheese layers.

Pizza2Go? PIease, hell no.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £14.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Pizza GoGo

Branches of Pizza GoGo not solely appear to be in every single place in London, however appear to have been round eternally – although you in all probability don’t know anybody who’s ever really ordered a pizza from them.

You’re not lacking out on a lot, no less than you’re not if you happen to order from the Tower Bridge department. The non-obligatory skinny crust was crunchy with a floppy base, considerably resembling a stale, warmed-over breadstick. The honestly-advertised Cheese and Tomato relied on the vaguely milky and considerably caramelised cheese for flavour because the tame tomato may as properly have been utterly absent.

Pizza GoGo’s normal crust was within the vein of these from different old-fashioned takeaways: thick, bready and stodgy. Even so, that crust was nearly a welcome aid from among the flaws of the burger pizza. The weeny cubes of textureless beef have been extra like a plant-based protein various, whereas there was subsequent to not one of the promised burger sauce. There was a light sweetness and crunch from the onions, extant tomatoes and gherkins, but it surely’s a really unhappy burger pizza certainly that has to lean on these toppings for pleasure.

I’m undecided why Pizza GoGo serves churros, however I do know that you simply shouldn’t organize them. These churros have been pale, flabby, sweaty and droopy – very similar to somebody who’s been consuming an excessive amount of pizza. The unwholesome, unappetising look and mouthfeel nearly made me assume these churros had been steamed quite than fried. In any case, the mediocre melted chocolate inside counted for little.

Pizza GoGo? Pizza no, no.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin/Bin.

Pizzeria L’Opera

Pizzeria L’Opera is one other takeaway on Previous Kent Highway, a number of doorways down from Verona, however there’s not a lot to sing about right here.

The skinny and gentle crust was forgettably breadstick-like. Simply as yawn-inducing was the generic umami from the melding of cheese and tomato within the margherita. A number of burblings of fruity acidity seeped out together with imprecise whispers of dried basil, however that’s as a lot noise as this margherita managed to make.

The ‘Buffalo’ margherita was barely any higher. Certainly, if something, it was worse. Not as a result of the additional toppings have been essentially meagre in quantity, however as a result of they have been meagre in high quality. Laid on prime of the usual margherita have been drearily uninteresting discs of buffalo mozzarella and equally ineffective cherry tomato items. Basil oil had allegedly taken the place of the dried basil, but when something it had even much less stage presence.

Dry slabs of chocolate cake – on multiple event – barely had any sweetness, regardless of the sponge’s sarcophagus of icing.

The strawberry cheesecake was a bit bit higher, the so-so strawberry compote sitting atop tart cream cheese and a loose-crumbed biscuit base. Even so, a Muller Nook with some Hob Nobs would’ve been extra convincing.

Very similar to the GoCompare tenor, the pizzas from Pizzeria L’Opera are irritatingly unhealthy however finally roughly innocent.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Crimson Planet

When you’re anticipating pizzas which can be out of this world from Crimson Planet, regardless of the already attested cookie cutter mediocrity of their ‘margherita’, then I’m right here to deliver you again right down to Earth.

The concept of doner kebab meat on a pizza fuelled my creativeness, however the actuality was solely barely extra edible than four-star leaded petrol. The ‘deep pan’ crust was even thicker and stodgier than Crimson Planet’s regular, whereas sweetness was the dominant style within the toppings from the bell peppers to the oddly chosen burger sauce. The dry, oversalted coils of doner meat weren’t solely misplaced amidst all of the sweetness and a budget, heavy cheese, it was additionally a grave insult to the spitroasting traditions of the japanese Mediterranean. This doner pizza may need had an opportunity at working with higher tomatoes and maybe some chillies and a few type of garlic. However I suppose we’ll by no means know.

Crimson Planet’s suggestively named Hanky Panky Cake was about as titillating as a blow-up doll. The loose-crumbed, considerably moreish biscuit base was moderately pleasurable. The forgettable chocolate and the vaguely candy and tart cheese layer weren’t.

Crimson Planet’s pizzas not solely failed to achieve orbit, they couldn’t even obtain lift-off.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.75
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Tops

Tops’ cheeseburger pizza was surprisingly evocative of an precise burger, far more so than the competitors. Though finely floor, the minced beef was moderately tangy. Its average heft and the sweetness of the cheese and burger sauce was offset moderately properly by crisp onions and sharp pickles. The thick doughiness of the kit-dervied base was oddly becoming right here, serving to to finish this responsible pleasure.

The biscuit base of the banoffee pie was surprisingly satisfactory, however every thing else was not. The caramel layer was lip-shrivingly tangy, whereas the dairy layer was extra like permafrost in its chilly crunchiness.

There’s not an enormous quantity to Tops that separates it from its traditional takeaway brethren, a selection topping right here and there, but it surely’s nearly sufficient to assist it stand aside. Simply.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £10.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Verona (aka La Milano, La Venice)

This Previous Kent Highway pizzeria cheekily trades below a number of names on the supply apps, all with equivalent menus so far as I can inform.

Whereas the margherita had moderately umami tomatoes, the dried and extant basil did not comply with by way of. Mozzarella was slippery and taut, however tasted of surprisingly little. The most important flaw, nonetheless, was the tasteless supermarket-style crust. Whereas skinny and light-weight, it was nonetheless far too bready.

The identical crust additionally bothered the California. Regardless of this, in addition to the wilting feta and merely performative spinach, this vaguely West Coast pizza wasn’t too unhealthy. The sundried tomatoes and roasted onions have been dominant with their sweetness, whereas undertones of dill and probably garlic added a wee bit of additional character.

The tiramisu was much less just like the traditional dessert and extra of a vaguely tiramisu-themed sponge cake. Fairly moist layers of sponge alternated with seams of bracingly chilly and vaguely coffee-flavoured cream.

It’s underwhelming pap like this that helps give the eateries on Previous Kent Highway a nasty title. Irrespective of which title this takeaway trades below, think about it a selection of the final resort.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Yummie Pizza

The annoyingly spelt Yummie Pizza oddly straddles the road between old-fashioned takeaway and supply darkish kitchen. Regardless of organising store in a railway arch, it insists on serving up a menu of what seems to be catering package pizzas.

It does one factor barely in another way although – its crusts. Though Yummie’s skinny crust choice seems to be like these from different old-fashioned takeaways, it was far crisper and puffier – no less than whereas heat. When you dawdle and let it cool, it may possibly rapidly harden and turn into far chewier. Nonetheless, whereas heat, it was a surprisingly first rate basis for the basil-free ‘margherita’. Certainly, it was arguably much more pleasurable than candy, sometimes tart melange of bog-standard cheese and tomato.

Yummie has a few ‘spicy’ choices on its menu, however solely the ‘Indiano’ is marketed as having ‘chilli’ on it. That ‘chilli’ turned out to be scorching sauce, however this wasn’t too unhealthy because it did have some periodic spicy warmth alongside its sweetness. Much more offensive was the textureless, flavourless cubes of what was alleged to be tandoori hen. Virtually as peculiar was the usual crust which, regardless of being unexpectedly thinner than the skinny crust, was a far doughier, stodiger affair. It’s as if this pizza had been cobbled collectively from leftovers foraged from the again of a pupil’s fridge.

I don’t know why Yummie Pizza serves up churros, however I do know that you simply shouldn’t organize them. Smooth quite than crispy on the surface, chewy and flabby quite than ethereal on the within, these churros have been a perverse inversion of what churros needs to be like. The lip-pursing sweetness of the dulce de leche, discovered each contained in the churros and as a dipping sauce on the facet, added harm to insult.

Yummie Pizza got here perilously near rising above its old-fashioned takeaway and darkish kitchen brethren with its skinny crust, however got here thudding again right down to earth with its worn-out toppings. Not yummie, extra like glummy. 

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £12.95
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin/Win.

Avenue meals

Dangerous Boy Pizza Society

The marginally overnamed Dangerous Boy Pizza Society is the present incumbent pizza stand at Vinegar Yard, the property growth website pretending to be a avenue meals market.

Dangerous Boy are in actuality good boys, knocking out pizzas with gentle, gently charred crusts and skinny, floppy bases. Though the crusts have been barely too chewy and never fairly as puffy and ethereal as I might’ve preferred, these have been nonetheless well-crafted carby foundations.

Though the margherita suffered from wilted basil, it was removed from being a dud. Supple, taut and hefty mozzarella got here with umami tomato, each of which oozed seductively into the bottom.

Regardless of their title, none of Dangerous Boy’s alt toppings have been particularly daring. The headlining honey on the Infamous PIG was conspicuous by its absence, so the porcine duo of pepperoni and nduja needed to decide up the slack. Pepperoni slices have been suitably thick and meaty. Whereas the nduja had some piquant pep in its step in addition to a light coarseness, each have been nonetheless a bit too restrained to actually stand out in opposition to the backdrop of high quality mozzarella and tomato.

Ultimately the gang at Dangerous Boy have been extra like mama’s boys, sticking carefully to the Neapolitan template with their makes an attempt at innovation feeling a bit timid. Nonetheless, their pizzas usually made for positive consuming.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £8
Crusts- bin, sin, dip or win? Win.

Fresco at Mercato Metropolitano

I’ve reviewed the resident pizza stand at this huge avenue meals corridor earlier than, through the Earlier than Instances. For as soon as, it’s a pleasure to say that an eatery has managed to get higher with time – even when only a bit – quite than worse.

Extra pliable than an Olympic-level gymnast, the crust and base was gentle, elastic and puffy with a delicate char. Though the basil on the margherita wasn’t as much as a lot, the respectably creamy and taut mozzarella melded properly with candy, acidic tomato.

The quixotically-named Blissful Grumpy took the identical basil, dough and mozzarella from the margherita, whereas including smol but starchy and tender cubes of potato in addition to a scattering of sausage meat. Whereas moderately bittersweet, the sausage wasn’t fairly coarse and meaty sufficient. Even so, this was nonetheless a extremely pleasurable pizza.

This stall just isn’t solely one of many few merchants at Mercato Metropolitano that I can heartily suggest, it’s additionally one of many stars of this complete group check.

★★★★☆
Margherita worth: £7
Crusts- bin, sin, dip or win? Win.

Good Slice at Flat Iron Sq.

Good Slice is the brand new pizza stand on the relocated Flat Iron Sq., just some doorways from its earlier location, changing earlier pizzaiolos Baz and Fred.

Clean, slippery and hefty mozzarella was let down by a lone basil leaf that was solely moderately aromatic and tomatoes that had solely a transient acidity. The most important letdown of all was the bottom. Though skinny and fairly puffy, it was a bit too bready and never particularly gentle or elastic.

The ‘Huge Smoke’ just isn’t solely an allusion to London, however refers to its smoked mozzarella. Its smokiness and creamy bulk tasted tailored for the fragrant rosemary, so it was a disgrace that there wasn’t almost sufficient of the cheese. There weren’t sufficient of the candy onions, both. Sheaves of potato have been surprisingly gentle. The virtually crust-less base was crunchy and ethereal, however inconsistently so with the dough turning into noticeably thicker and jaw-stretchingly chewy in the direction of the perimeters. Very similar to the town itself, the Huge Smoke is a good suggestion in want of much more finesse.

The carby parts of the Veggie have been just like these of the Huge Smoke, however extra evenly ethereal and crunchy crisp. Though noticeably improved, it was nonetheless arguably a bit too arduous in locations. This comparatively modest flaw didn’t uninteresting my enjoyment of hefty, gooey mozzarella or the gently candy and milky courgette. The tomato and wee dollops of pesto have been solely sometimes umami although, which made this in any other case pleasurable pizza considerably out-of-kilter.

The Good Slice desires a slice of the motion, but it surely retains developing quick in a single too many locations. For now, anyway.

★★★☆☆
Margherita worth: £9.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin/Sin.

The massive chains

Domino’s

Having not eaten a Domino’s pizza in years, I braced myself for the worst.

Apart from the shortage of basil, the honestly-advertised Cheese and Tomato was largely inoffensive. The predominantly candy tomato, with the sometimes trace of delicate acidity, was the first drive right here because the cheese was a non-presence. Whereas loaf-like, the crust and base managed to keep away from turning into indigestible doorstops by sustaining an inexpensive thinness.

Domino’s try at a cheeseburger pizza was ineffectual, largely as a result of overly positive grind of its minced beef. The wilting onions didn’t assist, nor did the overbearing mixed sweetness of the tomatoes, burger sauce and pickles. The ‘Italian’ base was considerably thinner and crisper than the usual base as seen above within the ‘Margherita’, but it surely was at finest inoffensive quite than actively delectable.

Surprisingly, Domino’s pizzas weren’t the unbearably heavy stodgefests that I remembered. Having mentioned that, the one causes for actively looking for out a Domino’s pizza are a scarcity of edible options and/or inhibition-altering intoxication. Damning with faint reward? Extra like celebrating with caustic weariness, maybe.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £6.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Papa John’s

I had by no means actually understood the cult of devotion surrounding Papa John’s. Having lastly eaten a few of their pizzas, I perceive it even much less.

Papa John’s ‘authentic crust’ was barely price consuming with its head-battering thickness. The headlining duo of the Cheese and Tomato cancelled one another out, leading to an odd red-and-yellow melange of nothingness.

If Papa John’s cheese and tomato was a pale impersonation of a correct pizza, then their jackfruit-based pepperoni pizza for vegans was an oddly misshapen impersonation of a correct pizza. The plant-based vegan-friendly cheese had a slight slickness and gumminess to it, in addition to a ruddy silkiness that nearly made it extra cheese-like than the precise dairy cheese within the Cheese and Tomato.

The jackfruit posing as pepperoni was not solely an entirely unconvincing impersonation, it wasn’t even a pleasurable factor in of itself. I’d nearly be tempted to check its grainy bittiness to badly made examples of seitan, besides that may be a disservice to badly made examples of seitan. To be truthful, the tomatoes right here did have an occasional trace of acidity and sweetness and the slender ‘skinny’ crust was noticeably much less stodgy than the unique crust. Nonetheless neither of these attributes made this pizza price relishing.

In hindsight, the lumpen and doughy cinnamon scrolls weren’t ideally suited as a dessert following a hulking pair of pizzas. Chunkiness apart, these scrolls have been unimpressive with solely the faintest whiff of cinnamon and solely a light sweetness regardless of the sodden downpour of icing sugar. Weak.

I’d quite have the clap than eat Papa John’s pizzas once more.

★☆☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £15.49
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Pizza Hut

This iconic chain and slice of manufactured Americana ought to want no introduction. Till this group check, it had been a long time since my final slice of a Pizza Hut pie. Considerably surprisingly, the crusts have been thinner and comparatively unstodgy in comparison with the in any other case comparable and typical type of an old-fashioned takeaway. It was nonetheless a cumbersome loaf of a meal, simply considerably much less so than its late evening excessive avenue competitors.

A technique during which Pizza Hut was indistinguishable from that competitors was within the toppings of its Margherita In Title Solely. The vaguely moreish melange of cheese and tomato was, unsurprisingly, devoid of basil.

The cheaper ‘flatbread’ pizza used a skinny, floppy and forgettable base that has extra in widespread with the drained pitta bread at a cut-price wedding ceremony buffet than a self-respecting pizzeria. The mixture of pesto and tomatoes had a imprecise zingy sprightliness to it. The pairing of a vegan ‘Italian sausage’ with an equally plant-based cheese substitute was outstanding for tasting of nothing with an nearly negligible mouthfeel. It was like consuming calorific air. A pointless pizza if there ever was one.

Chocolate chip cookie dough arrived heat, however was barely palatable with a slight greasy consistency and minute chips that hardly tasted of chocolate. The accompanying lilliputian pot of vanilla ice cream was equally bland, however no less than it was ethereal and light-weight.

Pizza Hut has huge shopping for energy and experience – and but the very best they’ll do isn’t any higher than an old-fashioned takeaway counting on meals service catering firm pizza kits. That’s each an indictment of Pizza Hut’s supposed prowess and a backhanded praise for these catering corporations.

★★☆☆☆
Margherita worth: £14.49
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Simply exterior the borough

I couldn’t assist however order a number of pizzas from simply exterior Southwark to fulfill my curiosity. Given this geographic cheekiness, these pizzerias are unrated for the needs of this group check.

50 Kalò di Ciro Salvo

Regardless of the alleged status of the unique restaurant in Naples, the crusts and bases of fifty Kalò’s pizzas have been a considerably variable affair. On one order, the crust was skinny, however solely moderately gentle and with merely passable to under common ranges of puffiness and elasticity. All the things was enormously improved on a subsequent order, though it was nonetheless a tad too chewy with not fairly sufficient puffiness.

One of the best a part of the margherita was undoubtedly the slippery and taut mozzarella with its creamy heft. It simply outshone the tame umami of the tomato and the faint perfume of the basil.

The mixture of fior di latte mozzarella and parmesan made for a luxuriantly creamy and umami white pizza. It was a positive basis for the distinctive bittersweetness and fleshiness of the artichokes and the tanginess of the frivolously chewy bresaola beef flaps.

50 Kalò’s tiramisu was oddly uneven. One portion had a heap of custardy cream tinged with bittersweet darkish chocolate and a small however nonetheless affordable serving to of sentimental, squishy biscuit fingers. The opposite was only a blob of dairy with all of the style milked out of it.

Regardless of the wee portion measurement, the ricotta and pear torta – or a cheesecake to you and me – was well-crafted. The preliminary hit of sugary candy and grainy pear was true to the fruit, whereas the milky cheese layer and tightly-crumbed base made for a positive follow-up act.

Whereas moist and etherally gentle, the promised lemon-flavoured parts of the sponge cake have been extra aspirational than actuality. The lemon juice custard and peel-scented sauce have been generically candy quite than zesty or tartly acidic in any method.

Even by the requirements of hazelnut-chocolate spreads which can be really principally chocolate, the brown stuff on the Nutella cheesecake was solely sometimes nutty at finest. The moistly fluffy cheese layer had lots going for it; much less so with the loose-crumbed biscuit base. It’s considerably baffling that so many pizzerias not solely insist on dishing up Nutella-based desserts, however quite mundane ones too.

Given the uneven efforts of fifty Kalò di Ciro Salvo, one thing has clearly been misplaced in translation within the transfer from Naples to London supply and takeaway. Repute, it seems, isn’t every thing.

Star ranking: unrated
Margherita worth: £11.45
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Bella Italia

Stalwart chain Bella Italia is maybe finest recognized for its cavalier angle in the direction of the truthful distribution of ideas amongst its employees (which is hopefully now up to now).

The margherita from The Strand department was an unappealing development that additionally belongs up to now. With not one of the promised basil and barely any of the promised oregano, the meek melange of cheese and tomato can be extra at house on a pizza from an old-fashioned takeaway than on a pie from a graspingly aspirational chain. The dusting of semolina on the crust couldn’t disguise the arduous, barely above common supermarket-quality crust. At the least it had the decency to be skinny and light-weight.

With the ‘Pinsa Queen Margherita’, Bella Italia tried to vajazzle its drained and drab melding of cheese and tomato with a few different substances and a unique base. Sundried tomatoes made their presence felt with their distinctively candy pop and tang, whereas buffalo mozzarella added occasional hints of milkiness and heft. Having basil pesto stand in for contemporary basil is, in concept, a intelligent substitution. In actuality, the pesto used barely tasted of basil, by no means thoughts anything that’s alleged to be in that Genoese sauce.

The bottom and crust resembled stale focaccia which is both an indication of inept genius or genial ineptitude. All in all, this was a modest enchancment over the dreariness of the usual margherita.

Though the tiramisu arrived trying a bit like a crustless crumble or Eton mess that had inadvertently stumbled right into a tumble dryer, it wasn’t as unhealthy as I had feared. Though there was nothing extra to it than booze-soaked sponge, this did no less than imply it tasted of one thing – which is an precise achievement given the objectionable tiramisus served by among the pizzerias on this round-up.

Bella Italia’s casatelle proved to be unexpectedly winsome. Though the pastry was a tad too papery, it was skinny and light-weight. Whereas the promised honey appeared to be lacking and the filling was extra icing sugar than cream cheese, it nonetheless had an interesting fluffy zestiness to it. Nibble off the highest of every mini-empanada, drop in among the crushed pistachio scattered contained in the takeaway carton, and you’ve got a winner.

Bella Italia have been barely attempting in any respect with their margherita and attempting a bit, however not arduous sufficient, with their pinsa margherita. The pizzas have been much less bella and extra rubella.

Star ranking: unrated
Margherita worth: £9.99
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

Frankie and Benny’s

The 2 Frankie and Benny’s pizzas I had failed each by way of primary competency and in fulfilling the overwrought ambitions of the menu writers.

The skinny and bready bases nearly managed to remain on the appropriate facet of arduous. Simply. They appeared to have been liberally dusted with semolina in a useless try to disguise their textural deficiencies.

All of this was a poor basis on which to construct a margherita, so naturally Frankie and Benny’s continued piling on detritus and dross. Bland cheese and no basil have been unhealthy sufficient. Recalcitrant tomatoes have been even worse, with an acidity that repeatedly swerved into sourness.

I wasn’t anticipating Texas Joe’s-level brisket from Frankie and Benny’s brisket-topped pizza, but I used to be nonetheless stunned at simply how cack-handed this meat-topped pie turned out to be. The ‘brisket’ was mushy pap inexplicably wearing what seemed to be a cross between an inexpensive barbecue sauce and candy chilli sauce. That mixture led to a bracing sweetness that simply overwhelmed no matter tang the barbecue sauce may need had, in addition to the tasteless cheese and the incongruous rocket. As inept mockeries go, this one is a murals.

The fluffy cream cheese layer of the ‘New York Metropolis’ cheesecake was really fairly pleasurable. All the things else was not. The skinny biscuit base was sodden by an extreme quantity of caramel. The mixed sweetness of the latter and the meringue shards was an train in real-time tooth decay.

To explain Frankie and Benny’s pizzas as dank and debased would, it seems, be excessively lenient and beneficiant.

Star ranking: unrated
Margherita worth: £8.90
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Bin.

L’Antica Pizzeria da Michele

The Soho department of this famed Neapolitan pizza maker does ship so far as Southwark. First, the unhealthy information: whereas the bases of those unexpectedly giant pizzas (roughly 12-13in) have been skinny and floppy, the crusts have been only a bit too chewy – working my method by way of it was nearly as chore-like as listening to the workplace bore ramble on for hours at a time.

The excellent news is that the toppings have been prime notch. The lactic milkiness of the mozzarella, candy umami of tomato plus the aroma and nearly zesty ting of the basil got here collectively fantastically. All the things was completely balanced with nobody topping crowding out or overwhelming the opposite.

The cheeseless Pescatora is extravagantly spendy for a pizza at £28.90, however the vibrancy of the toppings was plain. Though the promised scallops have been lacking in motion, the plump prawns honked with each freshness and a musky funk. Mussels nonetheless of their shells have been briney and fleshy, whereas squid was agency and bouncy. Even with the candy umami tomato, the sheer bulk of those oceanic toppings meant this was much less a pizza and extra of a seafood platter served on an edible carby plate smeared with tomato.

The pizza fritta right here was a smidge thicker and doughier than the one from Theo’s, but it surely was nonetheless a outstanding testomony to the artwork of deep frying. Golden-hued and nearly grease-free, the intimidatingly hench but wafer skinny Italianate pasty had a fragile crispness that gave strategy to a gently tuggable chewiness. This eminently moreish dough envelope contained milky ricotta, brawn-like ciccioli and smoky, gently fatty pancetta. It was all sure along with a modest but unmistakably potent dusting of freshly floor black pepper.

When you’re after a few of these bracingly contemporary prawns from the Pescatora pizza, however in a extra manageable measurement, then the prawn carpaccio starter might swimsuit. Whereas nearly in the identical pricing ballpark because the Pescatora (£16.90 and £28.90 respectively), the heaping of crustaceans was moderately beneficiant and their high quality was indeniable. Henchly curvaceous but agency with an nearly citrusy sweetness, they have been so pleasurable that I used to be nearly primed to miss the promised however lacking garnishes of pistachio and shaved truffle.

Though the darkish chocolate coating of the Bronte sponge cake was nothing to jot down house about, this dessert nonetheless had loads of appeal. The delicately gentle and moist sponge was a positive conveyor for the pistachio sauce which was outstanding for its flavoursome faithfulness to the nut.

I’m pretty sure that the curls of nodini are deep-fried knots of pizza dough. In any case, every loop was gently crisp then chewy. Dusted with crunchy demerara sugar for an additional textural twist, then doused with extra of the that delectable pistachio sauce, these nodini have been direct of their delightfulness.

Whereas the tiramisu was small, it was completely fashioned. The eggy and custardy cream cheese layer draped seductively throughout the delicately gentle sponge, whereas hints of darkish chocolate and occasional wafted about. It was all impeccably tasteful, flavourful and balanced.

The Delizia Limone is the unfulfilled promise of all these lemon drizzle cake slices that you simply’ve ever purchased from a bake sale out of politeness, lastly given spongiform. A seductively eggy and buttery core of cream cheese got here encased in a fragile fruit-tinged sponge which was itself lacquered with a custard mildly evocative of the fruit. Each boldly creamy and subtly fruity, it was surprisingly beguiling.

Regardless of the problems with its crusts, L’Antica Pizzeria da Michele would’ve come near successful this group check as a result of sheer high quality of its toppings – if it had really been primarily based in Southwark. Alas, its inclusion right here is merely as an honorary curiosity – however what a pleasant, spine-straightening curiosity it’s.

Star ranking: unrated
Margherita worth: £14.50
Crusts- bin, sin or win? Sin.

Conclusions and The Winners

It received’t shock any of you to be taught that there’s a truckload of unhealthy and mediocre pizza on the market within the London Bridge/north Southwark space – and thus nearly definitely all through the remainder of the capital too.

As no-one on the market appears to be pushing the state of the pizza arts ahead in ASAP Pizza’s absence, if you would like high quality pizza that really tastes of one thing then it’s a must to search out a Neapolitan-style pizza. That’s to not say that the tried-and-tested Neapolitan model is the one method in existence to make a cracking pizza. However if you would like a pizza on this a part of city that received’t go away you full of remorse then it’s a must to get one from Bon Vino Enoteca Maltby Avenue, Crust Bros, Franco Manca, Pizza Pilgrims, Flatboys, The Three Stags, Dangerous Boy or Fresco at Mercato Metropolitano.

Whereas perusing that checklist of winners, it’d be tempting to assume that the pizza centre of energy on this a part of London has decisively shifted away from excessive streets and late-night old-fashioned takeaways to retail developments, residencies and avenue meals halls. Particularly given the headlines concerning the monetary issues at Pizza Specific.

That could be true if style and texture are your paramount issues. However, on the danger of sounding much more patronising than I really am, it’s totally different for the folks that may’t inform the distinction or for whom value, comfort and predictability/familiarity are extra necessary than style. For them, the large chains and old-fashioned takeaways (to not point out supermarkets and their pizzas) proceed to carry sway and no less than a few of them have been unexpectedly bustling with commerce through the course of this group check.

One ultimate thought. Given the nationwide fixation on deep-fried meals, it’s maybe shocking that pizza fritta aren’t extra widespread and well-liked in London and the remainder of the UK. They definitely will be rattling scrumptious in a method that a typical pizza can’t. Whether or not that is an untapped alternative or an comprehensible omission given the culinary conservatism represented by the state of pizza usually on this island, is a subject for an additional time.

– TPG